BREAKFAST IN HEIDELBERG
Said Brueghel to Hegel
“I’ve brought you a flagel.”
Said Hegel to Brueghel
“What is a flagel?”
Said Brueghel to Hegel
“A flagel’s a bagel
without all the dough.”
Said Hegel to Brueghel
“Thank you, but no.”

LUNCH IN HOLLYWOOD
Said Gable to Hubble
      “There’s a reason, I hope,
      why you put your telescope
      in the middle of the table.”
Said Hubble to Gable
      “A closer view is needed
      when you happen to be seated
      across from Betty Grable.”
Said Gable to Hubble
      “I hate to burst your bubble
      but it’s her body double.”
Said Hubble to Gable
“That explains the stubble.”

TEA IN EDEN
Said Haydn to Auden
“Tea’s rather odd in
the Garden of Eden.”
Said Auden to Haydn
“Because Adam peed in
the water it’s made in.”
Said Haydn to Auden
“And coffee in Eden?”
Said Auden to Haydn
“It’s safer in Sweden.”

DINNER IN NEW ORLEANS
Said Rimbaud to Rambo
“Would you like to rumba?”
Said Rambo to Rimbaud
“I don’t like to rumble
with guys half my size.”
Said Rimbaud to Rambo
“Rumba, you goombah!”
Said Rambo to Rimbaud
“I don’t care for gumbo
but I will split some fries.”

COCKTAILS IN ROME
Said Fellini to Houdini
“Have you seen my martini?”
Said Bernini to Houdini
“Or my peach bellini?”
Said Houdini to Bernini and Fellini
“Your bellini? Your martini?
Can’t say that I have.”
Said Fellini and Bernini to Houdini
“We left them right here, Harry,
when we went to use the lav.
Don’t you think that’s weird?”
Said Houdini to Fellini and Bernini
“They must have disappeared.”